After a very filling and very inebriating dinner, the girls all piled into the car and headed to Staggette Central, aka: the time honoured tradition of the Strip Club. This one was called Klub Kave and was recommended to us by Saadia's husband who writes about new clubs opening in the city for the Star. I was hoping to get off easy with just dinner, but my bridesmaids wouldn't let me off without a little retribution for their own parties and so I was dragged up on stage, experienced my first "lap dance" and "hand fed" a very interesting shooter by a scantily clad waiter wearing only a bowtie. Although we weren't allowed to take any photos, Hanna managed to sneak one in and as you can see by the photo, I am desperately trying to distract myself with my $5 bill (I folded it over and over again, if only I knew origami!) while waiting to be "violated" by "Black Magic". All in all, it wasn't THAT bad, once the guys saw me cover my eyes and coil in fear, they usually took it pretty easy on me. Even my lap dance (which was also performed by Black Magic,) was pretty tame. A few slaps of his ass (which was rock hard by the way, Sally was trying to hand me a quarter so I could bounce it off his butt,) and a little gyrating, it was over and I was left relatively unscathed.
We ended the evening just after midnight, which sounds like it was early but I wanted to get out of there before the boys got too aggressive and after all those drinks, I was ready to pass out. Unfortunately by the time I got home, there was no way I could lie down and spent the majority of the night sleeping upright on my couch. (I woke up at 3 am to move to my bed in my famous "pillow stack" position. One which my old roommate Saadia is very familiar with - she often saw me sleeping like that after a night out. You stack the pillows up on top of each other so that you are essentially sleeping in a sitting position and as you progressively feel less drunk, you remove a pillow one at a time until you are fully horizontal and can finally sleep in peace. That happened at about 8am.)
Thankfully no portion of the night was spent on the bathroom floor. Unfortunately I couldn't say the same for Gary. Per the photo above, you can see how I found him the next morning. Guess I wasn't the only one who had had too much.
It was a hilarious (once in a lifetime thank God,) night out and the perfect ending to my staggette. Now I'm ready to move onto the main event... the wedding!!
We ended the evening just after midnight, which sounds like it was early but I wanted to get out of there before the boys got too aggressive and after all those drinks, I was ready to pass out. Unfortunately by the time I got home, there was no way I could lie down and spent the majority of the night sleeping upright on my couch. (I woke up at 3 am to move to my bed in my famous "pillow stack" position. One which my old roommate Saadia is very familiar with - she often saw me sleeping like that after a night out. You stack the pillows up on top of each other so that you are essentially sleeping in a sitting position and as you progressively feel less drunk, you remove a pillow one at a time until you are fully horizontal and can finally sleep in peace. That happened at about 8am.)
Thankfully no portion of the night was spent on the bathroom floor. Unfortunately I couldn't say the same for Gary. Per the photo above, you can see how I found him the next morning. Guess I wasn't the only one who had had too much.
It was a hilarious (once in a lifetime thank God,) night out and the perfect ending to my staggette. Now I'm ready to move onto the main event... the wedding!!
2 comments:
4looks like a ton a fun Sorry I couldn't join you...
Oh my! You naughty naughty girls! Shower was probably an excuse for everyone to get down and dirty!
Post a Comment